look at this face :o)

look at this sweet face! this was the first picture that i took of miley after my nonny passed away. i know that nonny would have loved it!! my aunt would have printed it out for her and nonny would have called me to tell me how sweet miley is and how she showed this picture to all of her friends at prayer meeting:) she loved her great grandbabies!! i have missed my nonny so much these past 2 weeks! i would give anything to call her and talk to her one last time! i have broken down and cried several times this week, because EVERYTHING reminds me of her. i went to go meet a friend of mine this week at starbucks one night after the babies were asleep and i sat there in my car, in the parking lot of the coffee shop and started sobbing. starbucks is like an escape to me. many of you may not know, but when i was pregnant with miley, i went through a severely deep, dark depression. it was so hard and so real, but it was bigger than me and i couldn't shake it!! i would call nonny and cry to her on the phone and she would pray for me and encourage me. she sent me books to try and lift my spirits, but one thing that would always brighten my day was a frappuccino from starbucks. when bill and i would get the babies in bed at night, i would leave and drive to our local starbucks, order me a drink, find a good parking spot and call nonny on my cell phone. i would sit there for almost an hour and talk to her about my day or week. things that i was struggling with, things that were too scary or too deep to talk to anyone else about. she would always listen and would always have something encouraging to say or scripture that i needed to hear. man, i miss her!! so this week as i was sitting in that same ol' parking spot at starbucks, waiting for my friend... it was all too real! she is really gone and no matter how much it hurts or how much i want to talk to her.... i can't. so yet again, i am here crying! words cannot express the pain that is felt when you lose someone who is so important to you... someone you love so much!! i cried again last night, when i looked at this picture of miley. i know that she would have loved it and i can hear her giggle as she talks about the sweetness of miley's face. so, i didn't mean to get into all of that... i just wanted to share with you, miley's new fishy face :o)